Bad days don't last , so hold your head high and don't let your tiara fall. Prepare yourself and begin a brand new chapter in your life. Rebuild yourself with new memories , new experiences and new things. Forget about everything that's people who hurting you and stopping you from feeling limitless.
First of all , let me take a selfie and enjoy the last day of 2017 hehe.
2017 is coming to an end. I still can't believe that 2017 is almost over.
I just fly back from travel , sitting in front of my laptop , munching the dominos pizza and refreshing myself what I have done throughout the whole year. Yeah , honestly tell I do nothing. * depressed *
It might a heavy blog post but also heavy photo post. ( Please don't mind , foodaholic is here. )
I am a person who love to learn knowledge , know more about the world and free like a bird.
Realize that I still ignorant while facing the problem in the reality. I feel so helpless when I don't know how to solve the problem , my mind being stuck and blank during the whole time.
My elder brother teaches me how to solve the problem. He said why I being so afraid and scare as like the rat act.
Be courage is an difficult things but I have been told that I should move forward instead stuck in the old places. I used to be lazy , weak willpower and easy affected by friends. But now , I have changed ! It's actually starting from November which is my friends start to abandon me and concentrate on their final exams.
I always love cheese-based food. This dominos pizza never fails my imagination lol.
Let us talk about what I have learnt during last two months.
Yeah , I think it is normal since I have paid attention on lesson during the class , everyday sleep early , eat healthy food and watch anime in this tension final exams. I am not giving up myself , despite that I don't study hard still get an CGPA with a great number. I am not flaunting myself and this is just the fact.
Everyone seems me like a piece of shit , giving up and abandon me. Yeah , I don't know how to describe my feeling , " depressed " maybe appropriate to that time feeling. Back then , I feel unhappiness and despondency for friends.
Tomato cheese pizza rawrrrrr , appetizing and tasty pizzaaaa , I can finish all by myself.
Those wounded places hurt by other people , will surely become our strongest places.
I strongly believe that , we hurt , we fall , we absolutely grow up , because of them , I start to live alone , learn how to live alone. Initially I feel extremely lonely , huge traumatize is attacking me , since I have never be alone , always company by friends.
I don't cry , but I feel deserted. I start to do the whole things by myself. Eating , playing , reading novel / manga , watching anime and even writing the blog. My brother consoles me , he say he will bring me to eat a lot of delicious food in Singapore , don't be stress and be happy. That month , I almost close down all my chatting social media , except for Instagram and Facebook. These two social media always hold a lot of my favourite cosplayer , blogger and novel author.
After travelling to Singapore and China , I feel like I still have a lot of things to do. Yes , I refresh my mind , sightseeing the beautiful scene of the country and realise that I have wasted the whole month. There are a lot of great idea popping out of my mind after traveling.
I jot down every single idea , even though it is small , but it is useful and not to duplicate with other people.
Conclusion : Learn to endure loneliness & Learn to live alone.
In your future life , there are countless such moments like this. I'm different from every of my friend's values. There is no right no wrong , just different values can't makes us pursue the dream together. I believe that I will meet someone has the same values of friends.
At this timing , Develop your interests and hobbies , make them perseverance and passion.
Yes , I will keep on going what I have doing right now. Blogging , Writing , Reading , Watching , Learning , Traveling , Playing , Designing , Crafting and Drafting. I love to express myself despite that my English still very poor. I love writing a new content for my novel despite that I am poor in Mandarin. I love reading those amazing articles and light novel. I love to watch anime and exciting genre dramas , I love to learn new things like cooking and sewing. I love to travel to country despite that it needs a lot of money , I love to play despite that my age keeps growing but my heart forever 18. I love design my own things , like original character for my novel. I love to craft a new things and draft different type of patterns.
Throughout the whole things , YES , I will move forward with my arms and strengthen my willpower and heart.
 |
| Taken during the flight to China. |
Don't worry , I still improving my English and Japanese writing skills through watching those English subtitles and Japanese audio.
Here was the outing with friends before my flight to Singapore and China.
Please do not use " busy " as your excuses. I don't like it from the bottom of my heart. If someone values me on this way , allow me to say this " Please date to your work and course but not me. " I feel so calm after meeting them though my heart is like roller coaster at that time.
If you value someone is important , you definitely will squeeze the time for her / him. Yes , it depends on how you assess that person.
Friendship no longer important to me. We no longer vibes in the same frequent. Sincere friend always quality over quantity too.
Here was the food. Fruits Ice Cream from our local new bingsu ( Korean ) dessert shop. It was so nice and it is also a new open shop but the smell of painting wall was a bit disgusting.
I always love to eat fruit ! YUMs !
Watermelon , Honeydew , Grapes , ( I forget another one of fruits name lol )
Actually I can make this dessert too , just cut all those fruits in dices as a dressing , a scoops of vanilla and peanut as the topping. * laugh *
Matcha Ice Cream. Nowadays I like to choose Matcha flavour though I actually don't like it much but over time you will addict to the taste that circling around bitter and sweet.
You will realize that Matcha always matching with red bean. It neutralizes the whole bowl of Matcha taste.
I love that Yellow Ice Cream and it is corn flavour !!!
Dressing with cornflakes ? What a nice perfect.
As I mentioned before , Sarawak Laksa is a must to eat while foreigner travel to Sarawak. It is the most famous dishes in Sarawak.
Always Japanese Meal.
I have tried out all of the new dishes that launched by Sushi King.
Wow that beef eggs donburi amazes me , love the soft and smooth textures of beef and thick of eggs smell. RAWRRRR , I love to eat eggs so much !
The heart shape of waffles , blueberry jam as topping and strawberry as seasoning , WOWs , 100 % sweet as honey lol. I can't endure the taste since I have quit the artificial sugar for a month.
It is my first time to try strawberry milk. It's dressing with colorful marshmallow on the top.
Girls heart " doki doki " desu !!!
Overall , SWEET.
Oh My God , my favourite raspberry cheese cake in secret recipe !
Yums ! Although I like sweet things but I eat less nowadays. I have to lower my blood sugar level and maintain a healthy lifestyle.
Chocolate cakes. OHHHHH I love chocolate.
Yes , I love everything. I'm becoming a white whale dude.
White chocolate cheese cake. White chocolate also a delicious dessert makes me fall in love with it.
Dessert part clear.
A reminder : I would not dining in the restaurant which the menu contains high calories and oily food. :)
I always last minute to pack my luggage even though the timing is nearing my boarding time.
YES , I actually pack quite well , all the essential things I have brought so no worries. ( Back then I always forget to bring the tooth brush lol )
Throughout the two foreign countries I am so inspire after flying to Malaysia.
There are a lot of amazing people who are struggling to achieve their goals. I also want to be one of them.
Next year , I only have three subjects to study during the next semester.
Further studying to the higher level , I still in the mist. Maybe I will base on my result and choose to study or not to. I am not going to fail any subjects.
My Japanese Language still consider very low. Seeing those people who love anime and inspire them to work harder to study Japanese language to achieve a higher level makes me super touching and .
I also want to be one of them.
While I travel to Singapore , when I am having my breakfast at coffee cafe , I see a girl who also reading the Japanese , and that day is the examination of JLPT. Wow , I make me want to study hard too. God damn it , I am exciting to learn new things !
I will concentrate more on Japanese language though my English language is poor.
I have heard my cousin who get her Muet almost band 6 , I am like " wow " that amazes me ! I should have worked harder too in order to achieve that high level. Since I haven't examined about my English Language , I shall work harder first.
Next year I will living alone at my hostel. * smile *
Even though there is no one can company in the upcoming semester , I will use wise of my private time. No gonna to waste it , time is gold and treasure.
I have to learn how to be strong of my willpower , strengthen my determination , my inspiration and my motivation.
Still , I will continue work harder on my novels. I love the main couple , I create them in my dream but their personality and individuality are based on reality. Traveling to country , seeing the love couples being super bold and daring on the MRT trains or in the dark corner of the street , I use them as a reference.
This is my inspiration.
I want to wear beautiful cloths and dresses , shopping together , makeup and attend the event , cosplay with the people who same interest , be a class lady.
Always remember , workout is a lonely work to do things in the world. No one company you , your slimmer friends always find you and hanging out with you in those high calories restaurant though they know you are in transformation process.
Honestly I tell you , I dislike this kinds of friends , they don't support you and attempt to make you become fatter. I lost my mind , become fatter by adding 10 KGs. 10 KGs , do you know that 10 KGs aren't a small amount and not easy to lost weight , you add 10 KGs in 2 mouths but you need to loss weight maybe use three to four months.
Weight : 108 KG , originally I was 96 KG.
Goals : 96 KG in 2018.
Goshhh damn it , I hate myself that time and now I am finding back my own confident and having some workout and eating a list of healthy menu. When my friends find me to those restaurant , I won't order high calories and I balance back my meal in the next day.
When I feel tired , I tell myself.
You're not tired , you are uninspired.
Always always remind myself when I lost my mind.
Yes , I am tired , but I am doing nothings , but then , what is the tired huh ? Tired of what ? I ask myself , keep repeating the question until I see a post from Kayla , she posts this in her instagram.
I am not tired , I just uninspired.
I think back why I start to lost weight ? Because I want to live a healthy lifestyle. YES , healthy lifestyle is important though I have quit intake artificial sugar drinks and foods , sleep early in the night , wake up early and having breakfast , quit fast food and oily food.
But now I have changed my primary purpose of losing weight.
I want to be able to wear a dress that I've bought three years ago. I love western type of long dress , that will makes me look elegant. And I also hope that I can cosplay my favourite character.
I am preparing my 2018 resolution , let inspire each other !
We deserve our own love. No body can judge us.
WITH LOVE ,
Judith Khoo
No comments:
Post a Comment